REUNION-the untold real expressions

VARUTHA PADATHA VALIBAR SANGAM

One word had struck the entire globe. Over the past decades nothing more miracle had happened.Our sangam the Reunion had begun and it will never stop.

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1…………….PHOTO - GALLERY

The list of our union below…………..

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SASI & KUMAR-THE SENIORS

SANTHOSH- OUR THALA

BALAKATHIR- OUR AUDITOR

SUNIL-OUR REMO

HARI - OUR SISYAN

ARAVIND-LITTLE MASTER

MONISH- STUDENT NO:1

KALAI-GOUTHAM-NIHTYA

2………………..EXPRESSIONS

KUMAR
” pacha molagai ( chilly)” - It may sound silly but there is an meaning for it so I need an explanation for this word from Mr.kumar. One of the great person with lots of humour.His speech are spontaneous ( nana pesuran thana perusan type..) and the next moment every one will burst to laugh.

SASI
Hmmmmmmmm coming to Mr.Sasi. He is thalaikaaaaa thalaaaaaa. I mean our thalai’s (santhosh)brother…annnaaaa vangana vangana aaaa aaa..Both of them are well wishers. They have the same mannerism in greeting and wishing others.Its from their blood. All must learn this from them.

SANTHOSH
Introduction must be sound and it can be none other than our thala “SANTHOSH”.He is a great handler of situations. Planning is the foremost thing he does and his plans never fail.One thing to say about him is he is our real hero and a leader. He will see to that nothing goes wrong and maintain a healthy relationship with all. We sometimes make fun of him but he never takes it serious . His behavior will be very dignified. Every time he sees anyone greets them with his warm heart. His words will be from his heart.

BALAKATHIRAVAN
He is only 15 days older than me but still he calls himself senior to me. He has a good sense of humor and loves music . Mostly we discuss about it only. We both have a similar kind of taste in those but he is more sentimental than me.He is a pasa malar brother - malar galai pol thangai.Affectionate,Humble,Passionate and a care taker of his sister. Cant explain more because words are not enough and no words can explain the meaning of brotherhood.

SUNIL

He is doing second year in Priyadarshini College.In the beginning of his college days he had changed his mobile number many times. we wont be able to contact him . Later we found the hidden secret behind it. He used to get many calls and when the mobile bell rings he will disappear. Still the mystery has not been found . will find it soon.

HARI:

If he sees a lake I am sure you cant catch him because he would have already dived in.Sayin this because once he did when i was standind beside lake.He is similar in all aspects with his sister expect one ,where she has a good communication and can easily mingle with a community But Hari is a calm and understandable person where everybody will like if happen a chance to meet.

ARAVIND

The little master.. Very Very helpful and friendly, enjoys every moment of life.The world is for him and nobody can stop it.

MONISH

He is a small boy only but talks like a grown up buddy.His intelligence levels are very high and his slang is perfect. Nobody can beat him in his style he deliver his Tamil.

3…………………………EVENTZZZZZZZZZ

THE MARRIAGE GALATA:

The beginning happened in this marriage and we were enjoying by singing songs. our remo had sang his ennavala song which is his favorite.

BIRTHDAY PARTY:

The season 2 had began and the gates were opened to the new era. Its the combined birthday party of me (suresh) and kathir..

THIRUPATHI THE JOURNEY:

Now the journey had began from the opened gate and it will continue for ever..

Advertisement Jokes:

Add for wives:

Wife Adds
1..FISHERMAN
Wife wanted, must be able to dig, clean, cook worms and clean fish.Must have own boat with motor. Please send photograph of motorboat.

2..MATHEMATICIAN
Wife required to complete the formula of my life. Must be numerate and understand complex algebraic logarithms. Needed to help further my family unit.

3..BUSINESS MAN
Wife wanted for company.

4..CAR DEALER
Wanted a sturdy, reliable, low depreciating wife. Should be in excellent working condition.

5..FARMER
Wanted a wife from good stock. Required for breading.

6..BANKER
Wanted wife who takes interest in me and credits me with her service.

7..Drunkard
Wanted a girl. Girl’s father should preferably have a drinks factory. I am an occasional alcoholic who drinks only when friends come round.Friends come round only seven times a week. Girl preferred who can carry me from bar to ghar-bar. Meet personally in a bar or send drinks for trial. Sample should be ample. .

8..MINICAB DRIVER
Hello! Hello! . This is number 9 calling from kottampatti.I need a wife to pick up.Driving license not necessary ,but map reading skills are bonus

9..BUILDER                                                                                                                                                                                      Wanted a wife to help build upon the foundations of my life. Must be homely and willing to build relationship from the ground up.

10..LAWYER
I hereby propose to solicit myself as an eligible candidate for the post of husband after marriage. The person whom I’m looking for should be strictly a girl. The girl should be strictly a girl, with evidence to support this view that she is a girl. The girl should be willing to surrender to the service and jurisdiction .

11..Accountant
searching for a figure with 5.8 height, 36 width, 24 breath. she should not make unnecessary expenditure and should bring profit and credit to the family

12..ASTRONAUT
I’m searching for a wife to fill the space in my life. Someone to share my universe. Must have looks that are out of this world!

13..CAR DEALER
Wanted a sturdy, reliable, low depreciating wife. Should be in excellent working condition.

Funny Joke:

A English lady visited Switzerland and was having difficulty finding a room, so she asked the local schoolmaster to help her.After a satisfactory room had been found, she returned to her home and did some packing.Suddenly,she had found that the room had no W.C. (in England, the toilet is called a Water Closet), so she wrote the schoolmaster about the W.c The Schoolmaster, not knowing the meaning, asked the parish priest and together they decided that it must mean”Wayside Chapel.” (church).

He wrote her the following letter:

Dear Madame ,
It is my pleasure to inform you that there is a W.C.just 9 miles from your home ,in the center of a grove of pine trees. It seats 229 people, and it is open onThursdays and Sundays. This is an unfortunate situation if you are in the habit of going regularly. You will,no doubt, be glad to hear that some people bring their lunches and make a day of it.
I would especially recommend on Thursdays, for then there is an Organ accompaniment. The acoustics in the W.C.are excellent; even the most delicate sound can be heard. My son was married in the W.C. and there was such a rush for seats that 10 people had to sit in the same seat. The looks on their faces were very interesting.My wife is sickly but dedicated. She doesn’t go regularly,and she hasn’t gone for nearly a year
I will be glad to reserve you a seat in the W.C. for you,where you will be seen and heard by everyone .

Yours truthfully
schoolmaster

TELEGRAM JOKES

TELEGRAM #1
A husband, while he is on a business trip to a hill station sends a telegram to his wife : “I wish you were here.” The message received by wife: “I wish you were her.”

TELEGRAM #2
A wife with near maturing pregnancy goes to railway station to return to her husband. At the reservation counter, while her turn came, it was the last ticket. Taking pity on a very old lady next to her in the queue, she offered her berth to the old lady and sent a telegram to her husband which reached as: “Shall be coming tomorrow, heavy rush in the train,gave birth to an old lady.”

Silly jokes:

1.. “Are you chewing gum?“
“No, I’m John Smith.”
2..”Why did you park your car here?”
“The sign says: ‘Fine for parking!’”
3..”I want to buy a dress to put on around the house.“
“Yes, Madam. How large is your house?”
4..”I spent three years in college taking medicine.“
“Are you well now?”
5.. “I’ve got a surprise for you, honey. I brought a friend home for dinner.”
“Who wants to eat friends?“
6..”I want some rat poison.”
“Should I wrap it up or do you want to eat it right here?”
7.. “Do these stairs take you to the second floor?”
“No, you’ll have to walk

8.Brandy+ Water = injurious to kidney,  Rum+ Water= injuroius to liver ,Whiskey+ Water=injurious to heart ,Gin + Water = injurious to brain.

so, dont drink water

Terror Humour:

A friend of mine lives in Malleshwaram. One day he went to kumaran Road to visit his uncle for some days as his parents had to attend a wedding in Coimbatore.One evening he and some other of his college friends went to jampur for a movie. He had so much fun that he forgot that it’s very late. He caught the last local bus to kumaran Road .He had to walk about a mile from the bus stop to home .As he was walking alone, he could sense that the night felt very creepy as it was so dark.While walking, he was astonished to see an old creepy looking guy selling some books. It was a very unusual thing to see a thing like that .

It got the shivers on him when he noticed that this old guy is unusually pale and staring at him.The old guy said “Son why don’t you get a book,it would keep you company”. Then he did something which he would regret for the rest of his life. My friend started to act brave & thought why not & had a look at his collections. My friend’s hair started to rise up as he noticed that all the books were related to supernatural activities,but he found one that was very interesting.

So he asked the old man”how much is it, uncle?”The old guy replied, “Well son…this is an interesting book…it’s only for Rs 250. My friend was shocked and said”but,it’s expensive.”This time the old man stared which freaked my friend.
My friend quickly checked all his pockets & found Rs. 200 &said “This is all I have.”The old guy replied “It’s ok son …you can have the book for that price”As my friend was just about to run for home…the old man called back& said “Son … whatever happen, you don’t ever flip the book to it’s last page… remember these words or you would regret…!!!!!”
My friend nodded and never looked back . Reaching home he quickly asked his Uncle whether there was any new old book seller nearby?The Uncle replied “not that I know of but ,we’ve heard that there’s 1old man comes once in a while during full moon nights but heard that there is something creepy about it…why son?” My friend freaked out…he told his uncle “nothing uncle…just asking”. He started reading the book with the old man’s words on his mind.
At night,12 0′clock, as he went to bed, a gush of wind blew which chilled him up to his bones.At that glimpse, he noticed the wind had blown the pages to its last page.He remembered what the old man has said! But we humans tend to have the tendency to try and know more than we ought to know. Out of curiosity, very fearfully he flipped through the pages. And then he reached the last page & as he read it he fainted.

Do you want to know what was written in the last page .( click and drag to see the hidden text or drag using your mouse to highlight the text below)
BOOK FOR SALE!
Original Price: Rs. 20
Promotion Price: Rs. 10

Jokes on Sayings:

” A Chicken crossed the road’ & everyone saw it.
Now the question was asked “Why did the chicken cross the road?”

1. Einstein
“Whether the chicken crossed the road or the road went under the chicken depends upon the frame of reference.”

2. B.R. Ambedkar
“It is the fundamental right of all the chickens to cross the road.”

3. Romeo
“The question is not why the chicken crossed the road, the question is that who was standing on the other side of the road.”

4. Newton
“There was an inertia acting on the chicken which made it cross the road.”

5. Aristotle
“As water & solids have ‘gravity’ which is the property to go down similarly all chickens have ‘chickenity’, the property to cross the road.”

Sardar JEE Jokes

1…Q :How to instantly recognize a sardar?
You can be sure the person is Sardar when he:
* sends a fax with a postage stamp on it.
* takes a ruler to bed to see how long he slept.
* studies for a blood test and fails.
* misses the 44 bus, and takes the 22 twice instead.
* drives to the airport and sees a sign that said “Airport left and returns home
* gets locked in Furniture Shop and sleeps on the floor.
* Sardar ordered a pizza and the clerk asked if he should cut it in six or twelve pieces. “Six, please. I could never eat twelve pieces.”
* sells the car to buy cars battery
* tries to drown a fish in water.

2..Q: “Have you ever read Shakespeare?”
Sardar: “No, who wrote it?”

3..Q:Why did 18 sardarjis go to a movie?
Because below 18 was not allowed.

4..Q:How do you make a Sardar laugh on Saturday?
Tell him a joke on Wednesday.

5..Q:What do you see when you look into a Sardar’s eyes?
The back of his head.

6..Q:What do you call a sardar who has only one drink?
Just-one Singh

7..Q:What do you call a sardar who drinks only beer?
Just-beer Singh (’T’ silent).

8..Q:Why does Sardar always smile during lightning storms?
They think their picture is being taken.

9..Q:Why can’t Sardar dial 911?
They can not find the eleven on the phone.

10..Q:How do you get Sardar on the roof?
Tell him the drinks are on the house.

11..Q:Why can’t Sardars make ice cubes?
They always forget the recipes ingredients

12..Q:What is the Sardar doing when he holds his hands tightly over his ears? Trying to hold on to a thought.

13..Q: sardar watching half the movie hurries to the school why ?
thinks that school bell has rung.

14..”Oh, look at the dead bird.“
Sardar looked at the sky and said “Where, Where?”

15..Three sardars walk into a forest and soon find a pair of tracks.The first said:
“I think they’re deer tracks.”The second said: “No, I think they’re bear tracks.”The third said: “You’re both wrong! They’re bird track .Then they got hit by a train.

16..A sardar buys a ticket and wins the lottery. He goes to lottery dealer to claim it and the man verifies her ticket number.sardar said: “I want my 20 lakhs now”The man replied, “No,sir. It doesn’t work that way. We give you one lakh today and then you’ll get the rest spread out for the next 19 months.sardar replied: “Oh, no. I want all my money right now! I won it and I want it.Again, the man explained that he would only get a lakh that day and the rest during the next 19 weeks.sardar, furious with the man, screams out, “Look, I want my money! If you’re not going to give me my 20 lakh rupees right now, then I want my 20 rupees back!”

17..Two sardars walked toward each other on a country road. sardar2 carried a bag over his shoulder.
sardar1:”Hey Buddy,” “what’s is the bag?”
sardar2:”Chickens”
sardar1:”If I guess how many, can I have one?”
sardar2:”You can have both of them.”
sardar1:”OK, Five?”

18. Sardar built two swimming pools .He filled only one swimming pool with water and the other left unfilled without water. when asked him about this he gave his beautiful reply. ” Tats for those who don’t know swimming.

19. Sardar tells this to his friend. I kiss my wife before I daily come to my office. His friend says oh I kiss your wife after you have gone out. hearing this sardar told his friend: heyyyyyyy jolly !!!!!! I am the first…

20. A sardar was lying in the American beach. An American came near and asked hi are you relaxing. Sardar replied NO.. Then after sometimes a beautiful girl came near him and asked hi you look smart are you relaxing. The sardar again replied NO. Then an indian girl over there came and asked are you relaxing. the answer was NO. He got feed up and thought to move from his place. one the way he saw an american speeping with his trousers in beach. He laughed at him seeing wearing only trousers that to in public and asked him what are you doing here wearing with trousers what about your pants. The American replied I am RELAXING. The sardar got angry and slapped him left to right saying all are searching for you . what are you doing here you stupid

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Scientific Humuor:

Scientific ways to catch osama bin laden:

1. Calculus method
First integrate the entire jungle with respect to  osama.
osama  would be lying some where inside the results
Now differentiate it, the lost constant term is osama.

2.Einstein’s method
Run in a direction opposite to osama with the speed of light. That means osama is running relatively towards you,when he comes near you can catch osama.

3. Newton’s method
Go into the jungle & get caught by osama.Since every action has equal and opposite reaction that means you have caught osama.

4.  Bill Gate’s method
Declare osama to be virus.Now use the Norton Anti Virus Scanner to scan the
jungle. It will easily catch  osama.

Logic Humours:

1..The disappointed salesman of Coke returns from his Middle East assignment.
A friend asked, “Why weren’t you successful with the Arabs?”The salesman explained, “When I got posted in the Middle East, I was very confident that I will makes a good sales pitch as Cola is virtually unknown there. But, I had a problem I didn’t know to speak Arabic.So, I planned to convey the message through 3 posters.. First poster, a man crawling through the hot desert sand.. totally exhausted and panting. Second, the man is drinking our Cola and Third, our man is now totally refreshed .Then these posters were pasted all over the place”.”That should have worked”, said the friend.”He replied, “Well, I didn’t know Arabic, neither did I realize that Arabs read from right to left.”
2..The college students was in a philosophy class, where a class discussion about whether or not God exists was in progress. The professor had the following logic:
Has anyone in this class heard God? Nobody spoke…..Has anyone in this class touched God? Again no body spoke….Has anyone in this class seen God? When nobody spoke for the 3rd time, He simply stated, Then there is no GOD.

A student did not like the sound of this at all, and asked permission to speak. The professor granted it, and the student stood up and asked the following questions to his classmates:
Has anyone in this class heard of our professor’s brain? silence…..Has anyone in this class touched our professor’s brain? Absolute silence….Has anyone in this class seen our professor’s brain? When nobody in the class dared to speak,                The student concluded, Then, according to our professor’s logic, it must be true that our professor has no brain!