Sardar JEE Jokes

1…Q :How to instantly recognize a sardar?
You can be sure the person is Sardar when he:
* sends a fax with a postage stamp on it.
* takes a ruler to bed to see how long he slept.
* studies for a blood test and fails.
* misses the 44 bus, and takes the 22 twice instead.
* drives to the airport and sees a sign that said “Airport left and returns home
* gets locked in Furniture Shop and sleeps on the floor.
* Sardar ordered a pizza and the clerk asked if he should cut it in six or twelve pieces. “Six, please. I could never eat twelve pieces.”
* sells the car to buy cars battery
* tries to drown a fish in water.

2..Q: “Have you ever read Shakespeare?”
Sardar: “No, who wrote it?”

3..Q:Why did 18 sardarjis go to a movie?
Because below 18 was not allowed.

4..Q:How do you make a Sardar laugh on Saturday?
Tell him a joke on Wednesday.

5..Q:What do you see when you look into a Sardar’s eyes?
The back of his head.

6..Q:What do you call a sardar who has only one drink?
Just-one Singh

7..Q:What do you call a sardar who drinks only beer?
Just-beer Singh (‘T’ silent).

8..Q:Why does Sardar always smile during lightning storms?
They think their picture is being taken.

9..Q:Why can’t Sardar dial 911?
They can not find the eleven on the phone.

10..Q:How do you get Sardar on the roof?
Tell him the drinks are on the house.

11..Q:Why can’t Sardars make ice cubes?
They always forget the recipes ingredients

12..Q:What is the Sardar doing when he holds his hands tightly over his ears? Trying to hold on to a thought.

13..Q: sardar watching half the movie hurries to the school why ?
thinks that school bell has rung.

14..”Oh, look at the dead bird.“
Sardar looked at the sky and said “Where, Where?”

15..Three sardars walk into a forest and soon find a pair of tracks.The first said:
“I think they’re deer tracks.”The second said: “No, I think they’re bear tracks.”The third said: “You’re both wrong! They’re bird track .Then they got hit by a train.

16..A sardar buys a ticket and wins the lottery. He goes to lottery dealer to claim it and the man verifies her ticket number.sardar said: “I want my 20 lakhs now”The man replied, “No,sir. It doesn’t work that way. We give you one lakh today and then you’ll get the rest spread out for the next 19 months.sardar replied: “Oh, no. I want all my money right now! I won it and I want it.Again, the man explained that he would only get a lakh that day and the rest during the next 19 weeks.sardar, furious with the man, screams out, “Look, I want my money! If you’re not going to give me my 20 lakh rupees right now, then I want my 20 rupees back!”

17..Two sardars walked toward each other on a country road. sardar2 carried a bag over his shoulder.
sardar1:”Hey Buddy,” “what’s is the bag?”
sardar2:”Chickens”
sardar1:”If I guess how many, can I have one?”
sardar2:”You can have both of them.”
sardar1:”OK, Five?”

18. Sardar built two swimming pools .He filled only one swimming pool with water and the other left unfilled without water. when asked him about this he gave his beautiful reply. ” Tats for those who don’t know swimming.

19. Sardar tells this to his friend. I kiss my wife before I daily come to my office. His friend says oh I kiss your wife after you have gone out. hearing this sardar told his friend: heyyyyyyy jolly !!!!!! I am the first…

20. A sardar was lying in the American beach. An American came near and asked hi are you relaxing. Sardar replied NO.. Then after sometimes a beautiful girl came near him and asked hi you look smart are you relaxing. The sardar again replied NO. Then an indian girl over there came and asked are you relaxing. the answer was NO. He got feed up and thought to move from his place. one the way he saw an american speeping with his trousers in beach. He laughed at him seeing wearing only trousers that to in public and asked him what are you doing here wearing with trousers what about your pants. The American replied I am RELAXING. The sardar got angry and slapped him left to right saying all are searching for you . what are you doing here you stupid

21.

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10 Responses to “Sardar JEE Jokes”

  1. kul Says:

    sardar is also a big joke

  2. didar singh Says:

    u r a stupid fool deart!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

  3. sureshrec22 Says:

    Hi, Didar Singh ..I am not offending any one. These are already present theme jokes.

  4. MARK Says:

    SARDAR are really funny and sweet, and they making life more charming

  5. MARK Says:

    Sardar Jee Jokes

    1.One day a sardarji was sitting in his office on The thirteenth floor building when a man came running in to
    his office and shouted “Santa singh your daughter Preeto just died in an accident” Sardarji was in panic. Not
    knowing what to do he jumped from his office window. While coming down when he was near the tenth
    floor he remembered he didn’t have a daughter named Preeto. When he was near the fifth floor
    he remembered he was not married.When he was about to hit the ground he remembered he was not Santa Singh.
    ************* ************* ************* ************* *************

    2. A sardar walked up to the front desk of the library and said, “I bor-rowed a book last week, but it was the
    most boring I’ve ever read. There was no story whatsoever, and there were far too many characters!” The
    librarian replied, “Oh, you must be the person who took our phone book.”

    ************* ************* ************* *************
    3. A sardar was walking along, when he looked up to observe a bird flying overhead. Suddenly, the bird
    dropped a load when it was directly over him. The Sardar says, “Good thing that cows don’t fly.”

    ************* ************* ************* *************
    4. A sardar is in a bar and his cellular phone rings, so he picks it up and says ” Hello, how did you know I was here?”

    ************* ************* ************* ************* *************
    5. How many sardars does it take to pull off a kidnapping? Six. One to kidnap the victim and five to write the ransom note.

    ************* ************* ************* ************* *************
    6. Why are sardar secret agents the best in the world? Because even under torture they can’t remember what they have been assigned to.

    ************* ************* ************* ************* *************
    7. Did you hear about the sardar who signed all his checks so no one else could use them if he lost his
    checkbook?

    ************* ************* ************* *************
    8. Did you hear about the sardar who asked his friends to give him all their burnt out light bulbs? He just
    bought a camera and wanted to set up a Darkroom.

    ************* ************* ************* *************
    9. Banta Singh was painting his living room one hot day. “Why”, his friend Santa Singh asked him, “are you wearing two jackets?”.”Because,” said Banta Singh,”The directions on the can said to put on two coats. ”

    ************* ************* ************* *************
    10. A sardar was given the job of painting the white lines down the middle of a highway. On his first day he painted six miles; the next day three miles; the following day less than a mile.then the foreman asked the
    sardar why he kept painting less each day,he replied “I just can’t do any better. Each day I keep getting
    farther away from the paint can. ”

    ************* ************* ************* *************
    11. Why do sardars have see-through lunch box lids? So that when they’re on the train they can tell if they’re going to work or coming home.

    ************* ************* ************* *************
    12. A sardar’s response to the comment, “THINK about it!”: “I don’t have to think-I ‘m sardar! ”

    ************* ************* ************* *************
    13. Sardarji ( to doctor ) : ‘Doctor, I have a problem.’
    Doctor : ‘What’s your problem?’
    Sardarji : ‘I keep forgetting things.’
    Doctor : ‘Since when do you have this problem?’
    Sardarji : ‘What problem?’

    ************* ************* ************* *************
    14. Why couldn’t the sardar write the number “eleven”?
    He didn’t know which “one” (1) came first…

    ************* ************* ************* *************
    15. Why does a sardar only change his baby’s diapers once a month?
    Because it says right on the box “good for up to 20 pounds.”

    ************* ************* ************* *************

    16. One Sardar was enjoying Sun on a Beach in UK. A lady came and asked him, “Are you relaxing” Sardar answered ‘” No I am Banta Singh” Another Guy came and asked the same Question. Sardar answered “No No Me Banta Singh.” Third one came and asked the same question Sardar was totally annoyed and decided to shift his place. While walking he saw another Sardar enjoying the Beach. He went and asked him ” Are you Relaxing?” The other Sardar was much educated and answered “Yes I am relaxing. The Sardar slapped him on his face and said “Idiot, Sab tere Ko wahahn dhoond rahe hai aur tu Yahaan Aaram Kar raha hai.” (Translation … Idiot everyone is looking for you and you are relaxing here!!!!!)
    17. Having lost his donkey a Sardarji, got down to his knees and started thanking God. A passerby saw him and asked, “Your donkey is missing; what are you thanking God for ?” The sardarji replied “I am thanking Him for seeing to it that I wasn’t riding the donkey at that time, otherwise I would have been missing too.”

    18. So this sardarji is walking the other day and comes across a banana peel on the road. Can you guess what he might be thinking??
    “Saala today again I will have to fall……”

    19. One great day in Bombay, a couple were on a honeymoon tour. They saw one sardarji in front of a hospital (Breach Candy) was trying to fill some form. So the couple enquired eagerly ” Sardarji what are you doing ?” Sardarji replied that I had a baby and I filling the birth certificate form. The couple as per schedule, took the Bombay to Delhi for their next destination. On the next day, they find the Sardarji in Delhi filling the same form. So once again young couple asked” Sardarji what are you doing ?” Once again replied that I had a baby and I filling the birth certificate form. The couple said but sardarji yesterday you were in Bombay filling the same form, how come you’re in Delhi? Sardarji coolly replied “The form says FILL IN CAPITAL.’

    20. Surjit Singh saw that his friend Baljit Singh was very depressed. “What happened ?” asked Surjit. “Yaar, I lost Rs. 800 in a bet yesterday . ” “How come ?” “Well, yesterday, the one-day match between India and England was being shown live on TV.I bet Rs.500 that India would win, but I lost the bet.” “But thats only Rs. 500, where did the rest go ?” ” Yaar, I bet on the highlights too ”

    21. An Englishman, an American and a Sardarji are called upon to test a lie detector. The Englishman says: “I think I can empty 20 bottles of beer”. BUZZZZZZ, goes the lie detector. “Ok”, he says, “10 bottles”. And the machine is silent. The American says: “I think I can eat 15 hamburgers”. BUZZZZZZ, goes the lie detector. “Allright, 8 hamburgers”. And the machine’s silent. The Sardarji says: “I think…”, BUZZZZZZ goes the machine.

    22. A sardarji with two red ears went to his doctor. The doctor asked him what happened to his ears and he answered, ” I was ironing a shirt and the phone rang – but instead of picking up the phone I accidentally picked up the iron an stuck to my ear.” “Oh Dear! ” the doctor exclaimed in disbelief. “But .. .. what happened to the other ear?” “The man called back again.”

    23. There’s a funeral procession of a sardar going on a busy street. All the sardars in the mayyat’ are dancing the bhangra and singing and general ‘balle balle’ is on. The people on the street find it strange that instead of mourning everyone is celebrating as if its marriage baraat. So one of them asks Santa sing, “Singh saab, how come you are celebrating?”….. comes the reply :
    Its the first time that a sardar has died of “brain” tumour !!”

    24. Do you know what a Surdarji will do after taking Xerox ?
    He will compare it with the original for spelling mistakes !!

    25. Do you know what surdarji will do if he wants a white paper? (he already has one and he wants one more..) He takes a Xerox of the white paper !

  6. ILYAS Says:

    Can anyone find a beggar who is sardar?????????
    people just create jokes on sardar,but i think peoples are fools & not sardar’s.
    A sardar will do hard work but will never beg in front of someone,except his lord.
    Now its our time to wake-up from our innocence & stop creating such types of jokes. & i can prove this that all the peoples creating jokes on sardar doesn’t have daring to say this types of jokes in front of a single sardar even if u r a group of six peoples. its very easy to post jokes. if u can then say this jokes in front of a sardar.

  7. SARDAR HARMEEK SINGH Says:

    “ME BAAT KHOO ANA ABKE NA TABKE
    AGAR NA HOOTE GURE GODIN SING
    THO SUNAAT HOTE SABKE”

    “HIND KE CHADAR GURU TEG BHADAR”

    HUMPAR HASNE WALO ES WATN KAe LIYA JITNEE JAAN HUM NE DI AUR KISE NE NAHI DE ES DESH AUR THUMHERE HINDU DHRAM KO BCHNE KE LIYE HUMRE GUROO NE JO KURBANIE DE HE US KA EHASHA TO TUM JINDGE BHAR NAHI CHUUKA SAKTE HUMPAR HASNE WALE PANE ANDAR JHAK KE DEKO

    • Lions Born TO Rule Says:

      bhai inki dashaa ye hai ke inhe hasne ke liye bhi hamari zarurat parti hai………….

  8. Myumg Says:

    I’m attracted to the valuable info you provide inside your posts. I’ll take a note of your weblog and appearance again here frequently.

  9. Pasha bhai Says:

    Sardar’s are not a fools they are true heros and proud of our nation


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